It's The Thought That Matters

All this time, I've wondered to myself if I've really the strength to accept the loss of my close friends at any point in time and the dreaded day came so quick, I didn't even had the time to react properly to it. At 10 pm yesterday, I sent my friend off with a heavy heart and mouth. I didn't dare to utter a word, afraid that my words would fail me and let the tears take over. I could only wave at her as I watch her take her first step into maturity (hopefully). This girl, though she hasn't exactly been the one always by my side while I needed help and vice versa, has been a very close friend to me for 2 years or so as we continually shared our life experiences and secrets at times, often enough to build the trust that we had for each other. Now, the thought of missing her physical presence back here at home pains me as I realise that she won't be the only one leaving. My best friend will be starting university in 2 weeks time and the other two will be finishing their current course and from then on, the five of us will branch out as we walk our separate paths. Will we then, still be the five that we wish to be or will that just be a visage of the past, a memory that will fade out like a paper would in due time? That is the only question that I fear and have doubts about whenever I give it a second thought. Time will never be enough for any man in the world. Two weeks will seem like days when we're spending time with the ones we love and care about. Just two weeks ago, we were happily playing our card game in a diner and tonight, I'm having flashbacks of the times we've spent together as a group of friends who hung out in malls, going for trips, dropping by each other's houses to talk and catch up. If only time would freeze for the moment and let us enjoy all that we desired. If only. Fortunately, she'll be coming back in December for her holidays but time can only tell how we would react to her and likewise. People can change in a matter of days as a way of adapting to a new environment but I definitely pray that our friendship will never be broken due to the physical separation between us. Pardon me if I was beating around the bush in this post or unusually emotional but what can I say? I'm only human and despite the "tough guy" persona, one can only take so much emotional punishment from one's surroundings. It won't be enough to make me cry like a baby but it's certainly enough to make me contemplate crying like a baby in a dark corner of my room. On a lighter note, I wish you all the best in your studies and I pray that you will mature in life and find your better half there! I can't wait for us to gather once more as the best of friends and talk about everything just like old times. With this, I'm going to end with a quote that I saw somewhere in a webpage before.

"Friendship is unnecessary, like philosophy, like art... It has no survival value; rather it is one of those things that give value to survival." - C.S. Lewis